Enough is Enough

Enough. The word alone has so many meanings and different variations. There's so many ways to use it, but this is how the dictionary defines it:

determiner & pronoun
  1. 1.
    as much or as many as required.
    synonyms:sufficientplenty, a sufficient amount, an adequate amount, as much as necessary

When we try to please other people, or society, we're trying to be good enough. The definition says 'as much or as many as required." When you read that a few times, you realize that the phrase 'good enough' is actually an insult. I don't know about you, but I don't want to be only what is required.

Why don't we strive to be better than enough? To be greater and stronger and wiser and happier and so much more than just good enough?

Women have this undeniable pressure to be perfect; not only from society but also from our peers and even other women going through the exact same thing. With the risk of sounding cliche, we are held to the standard of airbrushed skin and model-thin looks and are thought that we should always be on our A-game. We should know how to contour but no one cares if we know the periodic table by heart. We can read romance novels but we're 'too smart' if we choose to read an archaeology magazine or Wuthering Heights for fun. If we're married, we're expected to have babies. If we're not married, we should be. The pressure knows no bounds.

We aren't allowed to not wear makeup without the repercussions of "She looks tired" or "She doesn't take care of herself." We aren't supposed to work a full time job without also making sure dinner is cooked and the house is cleaned all the time. When we forget to shave our legs, we cover them and hide them in long pants, no matter how hot it is outside. We put ourselves through (sometimes) painful beauty rituals to appease the audience of the world. We are never good enough nor do we feel it. The most confident woman in the world still has people telling her what she should and shouldn't be. The difference is, she ignores them.

Last week I said something about a popular singer that has beautiful curly hair. It's wild and could easily be tamed if she chose to, but she doesn't. She rocks her curly hair, and rocks it well. My little brother (age 10) overheard and said "She's gross." I asked why he thought that, thinking there was something I didn't know. "Her hair is awful." This little boy is the kindest kid with the biggest heart and he'd truly do anything for anyone...and here he is telling me a woman he doesn't know is 'gross' because of her naturally curly hair. A woman that I have always admired and who inadvertently helped me start wearing my hair naturally curly because we have similar texture. "If she can rock it, why can't I?" I thought. It felt like he was insulting me, something he'd never purposefully do. Without realizing it, my innocent little brother has become a mold of society. A woman doesn't tame her naturally curly hair, so she is disgusting.

ENOUGH. I've had enough.

When someone feels inadequate, they often hurt others to feel better about themselves. I've been hurt by even the closest of family and friends hating on my body because I'm not what society demands. I'll tell you a secret I've learned, no one is perfect, and because of that, society will always nitpick and poke and prod until every woman is broken down and feels defeated. You can be immune to this disease if you look past the outside skin of people, and into their hearts. A beautiful woman can still be the ugliest person if she has an ugly heart.

You are not perfect. You are not enough. You are far greater than that and any other of society's standards. 

Enough is enough.